I dont know whether i shud feel betrayed and depressed or be understanding.

My fiance postponed our wedding cos his company was not letting him go for his own wedding! And it is not just a few days, but 6 months!!!!!!!This when everything has been arranged back home!!!!!He says that they were subtly hinting that he will lose his job if he goes on leave. They wanted him to stay back and work on a project. If this happened in India, I can believe it cos our employers are notoriously known for bossing around! But in Canada, for an MNC company----Its completely unknown of!

And moreover, dont u think that after working for 6 years with a company where you have a great work record, u wudnt be so easily scared of losing your job considering they need you????????????

I am so upset and depressed about it since It was a complete shock. I had organised my leave and work. Bought new clothes, my parents were booking the halls,getting gifts...........everything was nearly done and this happens!!!!!!!!

And he expects me to take it and be understanding about it! I dont want to be understanding because i feel betrayed and hurt and disappointed cos my dreams are broken. How can i trust a man who breaks his promises? I dont even know now whether i want to continue with the postponed marriage plans............

My family is scared I am going to break it off! and I am very tempted to, no doubts about it. But I like him too. I know that I cant get a better man than him for me! And no, I am not being pessimistic. He is the kind of man who I want, he likes me immensely, has loads of patience to deal with my tantrums-especially since he broke the news to me, likes and respects my parents too, well-settled, gentleman etc etc.............but it still hurts. I think I expected him to put his foot down and stand up to his bosses and tell them, they cant make him do that..........but am I right? Would that have been the correct thing for him to do?

I feel like giving him grief, not talking to him,just sit and cry................and he doesnt understand any of this!!!!!!!!!!!

I am a big movie buff!!!!! Can watch any kind of movies unless its something like cloverfield where i had to run outa the theatre to puke my guts out!!!!!!!yikes!!!!!!never again!!!!!

Being in Melbourne, I dont get an idea of the different movies being released or the hype surrounding it! Like with Jab we met, i didnt realise it was such a huge hit. Yes, it is a cute movie but didnt have the makings of a great movie! And since only the top movies get released in selected cinemas here, i have to watch mostly english pics...

Currently, I am waiting for Hancock, batman, kung fu panda and a few others whose name i cant think of! :)

Oh Well! Anything to beat boredom! :)

Life is a song which needs to be sung........

good notes, bad notes, mediocre notes...........everything

for that is what makes each life special and unique.

I want to sing a song made uniquely for me! To sing a song that reflects me........

Oh!Is'nt it wonderful to dream such a thing and get it done!!!!!!

Dreams..........

I dream a lot....some good, some bad, some intuitive, some action filled movie sagas! :)

I also dream abt achieving goals, doing what i like, to reach something

dream 1: write and get something published

dream 2: achieve on ur own and live independantly

dream 3:..............

I prefer to write only dreams i have achieved so far! :) since we never stop dreaming........

Sometimes I go through an period of intense self-recrimination! I imagine that I have no friends, everyone hates me and talks behind me, bitches about me!I fear I have offended people, I fear life is going to pass on by, taking all my opportunities with it.

I am scared i am going to be left behind while people less qualified climb up the ladder of success, I think I am fat and ugly and unlikable and unlovable.........

God! What crap do I think????????

I  think i need psych help!!!!! :)

Cos I also know that none of what I think above is true!

The wind carries me forward,

like a leaf blown off the branch.........

onward i go.......on and on

till i rest in the shade of a larger leaf

It feels safe for a while till I hear a roaring sound

then I am carried by a big wave of water onward and onward..........

a journey to where.......I dont know.

Will I survive it..................

that waits to be seen.........

When we talk about commitment phobia, it is automatic to assume we are referring to a man! But what if the woman is the one with the phobia? What happens then? Is she called an emotionally unavailable person or is she just too scared of what the future might bring??????

I have been speaking to a guy through an arranged marriage proposal through my parents-- and yes, even tho i am modern in some ways, i still believe that my parents know best when deciding on a partner....... He is the most nicest person I have ever met. He is everything I have dreamt of. He hasnt met me tho we have seen each others pics and on webcam but according to him, he has fallen in love with the kind of person he knows I am. I am the one who is hesitant to take the final step of acknowledgement that yes, i mite be liking him too as a person. He is caring, romantic, sweet, mature, sensible, down to earth, chilled out, can cook, dance, sing......... :). (sounds like a catch huh?)

Knowing that the pros so far outweight the cons that I am not consideing that there are any cons as such, I am still scared of the future.........I think I am just scared to trust my intuition after the badgering it received a while back............. I know he is the kind of person I have always wanted for myself, someone who will make me feel secure about ourselves and who I know will never cheat on me nor put me down, someone who can be a friend and a partner..........but then what scares me..........

Every day,as i get closer to the D day, i think.omg! I am getting to the point of  no return!!!!!!!!!What if????????I know I shudnt think like that but I cant help it!.......

I trust in God and know that things wudnt have come so far if He hasnt willed it but .............

Is it normal to feel so scared about the ultimate test of life?????????????????

I have received a few blog friend requests from people and unfortunately i had to reject them.............

The one thing that i dislike is people having a blog in their name and not writing anything in it that sparks of originality! Its all quotes and jokes from some body elses blog or emails sent out. Its good sometimes to put them in but not in all of their posts!!!!!!!!!!

Why is life full of decisions to make? Life changing decisions and everyone expects you to just make up your mind and do it!
Is it that easy and am i making it so difficult for myself? Or is it a good idea to really think about the future effects of every decision to make?

vo aaye.........

ke hum unke intezaar mein hai

aankhen bichaye hui, saans dheemi si.......

ki vo aayenge abi